First Day of School

Today is Zeb and Ella's first day of school.  Melinda and I still have about 10 days to go.

First days (and last days) are nearly always emotional days.  There are so many emotions built into them; excitement, fear, dread, longing.  This year Zeb is a junior and Ella a sophomore.  So you would not think that this would be "ONE" of those 1st days, at least not for a mom.  But this one seems to have been the hardest one yet.  I know, I am still in the midst of it and it might not feel as hard in a month or two.

This is the first day of school, that Zeb is driving to school on his own.  Funny how now taking that four year old to preschool all of those years ago doesn't seem to hard.  That day the worst that could have happened is he missed me, he fell and scratched his knee, or some kid wouldn't share a toy.  This year my anxiety is along the lines of ditches, trains, cars, even deer. Followed by hospitals or worse.

Did they make it to school?  Were they on time?  What about the half hour drive home when we used to talk about their day?

I know it is crazy, but I feel as if I should get in the car and follow them just to make sure they get there safely.  I don't and won't.  But believe me, I want to.