Who wins the game?

Imagine that there is a football game scheduled for this evening.  Both teams have been working hard.  There have been long practices and drills.  All of the players are ready for the game.

We all understand that going into a game, one team is going to win.  The other is going to lose.  This does not stop us from wanting to watch the game.  It does not stop the players from wanting to do their best.  That is what GAME is.

But lets say that a parent or two who support Team A just don't want to see their team lose.  So, it being a home game, they rig the scoreboard so that it will never register a point for Team B.  This is a great idea, right?  This way Team A cannot lose.

Now a parent from Team B also does not want to see his team lose.  So he decides to let all of the air out of the ball.  This way, Team A cannot win.

Both teams go out on the field.  They stand there as the clock ticks.. game time is running down.  But they can't play.  Eventually, the game is over.  The players of both teams are still standing out on the field just looking around.  The crowd looks at the scoreboard:

0 TO 0

Cheering and clapping, the people sitting on Team A's side of the field are happy.  "Team B didn't win!"

Also cheering and clapping, those sitting on Team B's side look at the scoreboard.  "YAY!  Team A didn't win!"

Everyone has failed to realize that though the other team did not win, their own team has also failed to win.  But even worse than that, there was no game.  The players did not play.  No good came of this at all.  Even when MY team loses the game, I have enjoyed it.  I saw some good plays, maybe bad ones too.  One of the players may have even had an excellent game even if his team lost.  But not here at this game.  Everyone who walks away is a loser.


As I was watching the Hugo's last night, the whole thing just made me sad.  So many things about it (and not just the award ceremony, but most everything about this year) has been hard for me to take in.  When I woke up this morning I was still thinking about it as you might be able to tell from my football analogy.  My brain was trying to make sense of it all while I slept.  Sadly it came up with a no win situation.

I watched the No Awards being called out.  And people were cheering for that, really?  YAY!  We all lost?
I have loved science fiction and fantasy my whole life.  I have bookshelves filled with books.  I do not pick a book because the author is on Team A or Team B.  Sometimes I do pick a book because of the author.  Oh, this person wrote a new book?  I loved the last one I read by them.   But never because the author is on the RIGHT Team.

Last night tears filled my eyes as I knew that I HAD LOST!  It was me, it was you, it was him and her,
WE ALL LOST THE GAME LAST NIGHT!

First Day of School

Today is Zeb and Ella's first day of school.  Melinda and I still have about 10 days to go.

First days (and last days) are nearly always emotional days.  There are so many emotions built into them; excitement, fear, dread, longing.  This year Zeb is a junior and Ella a sophomore.  So you would not think that this would be "ONE" of those 1st days, at least not for a mom.  But this one seems to have been the hardest one yet.  I know, I am still in the midst of it and it might not feel as hard in a month or two.

This is the first day of school, that Zeb is driving to school on his own.  Funny how now taking that four year old to preschool all of those years ago doesn't seem to hard.  That day the worst that could have happened is he missed me, he fell and scratched his knee, or some kid wouldn't share a toy.  This year my anxiety is along the lines of ditches, trains, cars, even deer. Followed by hospitals or worse.

Did they make it to school?  Were they on time?  What about the half hour drive home when we used to talk about their day?

I know it is crazy, but I feel as if I should get in the car and follow them just to make sure they get there safely.  I don't and won't.  But believe me, I want to.